Flamboyant
by LimeshellsAreLazy
Summary: Marluxia is informed by his subordinate that his appearance is lacking in masculinity. Can Axel and Larxene find someone to help tougher the flower boy up a little? Crack Fic, implied yaoi.


**I intended for my first piece of Kingdom Heart's work to be full of depth and meaning. Instead you get this, a crack fic that's spawned from the stereo types given to Marluxia. Though I really did enjoy writing this, hope you enjoy reading it. This is my first humor fic ever so I apologies if it's a bit dry now. It shall get better! **

Disclaimer: I just want to own Axel's makeup, you can have everything else.

Flamboyant

Chapter One: Its Probably the Pink 

Something about Castle Oblivion seemed eerie. Something seemed cold and unwelcoming, something Axel just couldn't put his finger on. Then again he wasn't trying too; he just wasn't fond of the cold. Tightening his coat hood against the dome of his head he turned the corner and opened the door to the Superior's office.

Or rather the Superior of Castle Oblivion.

"You called me?" Axel wasn't sure how to address Marluxia at this point. While the man was behind him by three numbers, he was also in charge of this mission. There was also the element that Axel wasn't really going to conspire against Xemnas…Hm…Perhaps he just wouldn't address him directly. The dancer crossed his arms irritably, waiting for an answer.

A soft creek echoed creaked through the air as Marluxia sat up from his chair. The majority of his time was spent here in the lounging room, occasionally chatting with Larxene or studying the rare agriculture found in Wonderland or Atlantica. He was doing neither at this point. His posture was solid and poised, in many ways he resembled a porcelain statue. One of those angle tombs occasionally found in cemeteries. "Sit down" the words came out so softly, so swiftly, Axel wasn't sure whether it was a gesture or a command.

Regardless he sat down, slouching down to his lower back and spreading his legs almost indecently. "What? This 'bout Sora? Don't worry about it. We've got everything under control" Reaching up he pulled his hood down; the wild mane of fire came bursting free from it's constraints.

"This isn't about that spoiled little brat!" Marluxia's voice cracked like a riding crop, the first emotion he bothered to deliver. The assassin sat him from his seat and stomped over towards Axel with a strong sense of dignity and pride. And anger. "This is about **you**. This is about you and Larxene, and what you two have been whispering about behind my back..."

Oh. Fucking. Shit. The Flurry of the Dancing Flame's posture immediately shifted. He sat on edge anxiously, waiting for the Assassin to continue. Just what had Marluxia found out? What had Axel discussed with Larxene? Surely he hadn't mentioned where his loyalty resigned. No of course he hadn't, so what had he said…

Suddenly the door to the lounge shot open, the short petite Nymph poke her head through the gap. "You wanted to see me..." Her tone was as frustrated and agitated as ever. Without another word she walked in, sitting down aside Axel. The blonde pouted and crossed her arms, her colorful kunai stood between the wedges of her fingers.

"It's come to my attention..." Marluxia picked up, taking his usual seat. Cold Cerulean blue shadowed over them, never leaving their faces. His eyes monitored. His eyes studied and calculated. "...That the two of you find it amusing to talk about me in your free time. I've heard you on more then one occasion snickering and sneering at my expense..." The air grew as solid as stone. The silence was so strong you could faintly hear the scribbling of crayons a floor above. Suddenly Marluxia bolted up from his seat and lunged over, prying a hand into an armrest on both of their seats. "You too have been saying I'm a _homosexual_!"

Wait. What.

"Don't..." The Assassin warned, catching both of their expressions of confusion. Through his gloves his fingernails dug into the leather seats. "Deny it. Don't deny it even for a moment. I've heard both of you alone late at night. You've called me just about every name in the book! From fairy to faggot to a _catcher_! Now as your Superior I demand an explanation. Where does this idea come from!?"

The two remained silent, idle glances between one another.

"WELL?"

Still silence. Eight was the first to break it, clearing his throat and running a hand through his wild mane of red. "Well…The pink might have something to do with it..." he mumbled, fiddling with his own strand.

"Axel!" Larxene gasped, starring dumb founded.

"Well it's true! If he wants to know the truth I'm sure as hell going to tell him. Its only right of us isn't it?" Axel wanted to sit up; being this close to the Superior was a bit unsettling. Considering, well, he really did assume Marluxia was gay. Luckily he moved back, allowing the Dancer to sit up from his seat. "You can't deny it when we say you're a bit too feminine…"

Groaning Larxene held her face within her palms, knowing this was all going to go south.

"Personally I've never met anyone with pink hair. Had to ask Xigbar if it was natural or not..." He wouldn't put it past the Sharp Shooter to have dumped bleach in the other's shampoo. "Maybe it's just a dull red, and hell you know I can appreciate a red head. But its also the way you style it...you know...it's all feathered and frilly. Hell your hair is prettier then Larxene's!"

Marluxia contemplated this, sitting back down in his recliner. "So I appear homosexual because I take the time to style my hair? Just because I have a sense of self grooming doesn't mean you have the right to be so **rude**…"

"Oh no no it's much more then that" Looking about Axel picked up a box of crackers from the nearest nightstand. They were all rather messy; nothing ever seemed to get cleaned up right. Taking one out he sniffed it, and then chewed experimentally. Not too stale. "There's also the flowers. Not that I have anything against nature but that's a little fruity if you ask me. Then theres the way to act so dignified. Oh, and your lack of getting some ass! Then there's your weapon..."

"Enough!" Never in his non-life had Marluxia heard such things. He sat there, mouth gapped, seemingly starring off into space. It just couldn't wrap around his head. There was nothing wrong with nature, he thought, nature in its own way was cruel and dangerous. And pink was his absolute favorite color, it had such a warm vibrant feeling (not to mention it went wonderful with the leather). Finally the Assassin stirred, a low groan escaped his lips. "Larxene is this...true?"

Twelve didn't give him a direct answer, but he got enough of a response from the glare she was shooting at Axel. With a soft sigh he dismissed them both from the lounging room, then curled up onto one of the couches. He shivered softly; a wave of angst came splashing down.

"You idiot!" _Slap._ "Now he's going to be like that for weeks. I'm not about to try and cheer him up either" That would involve something far too feminine for her taste, like baking or gardening. What would happen if Sora reached the top of Castle Oblivion and Marluxia was still sulking on the couch?

"Well he asked" The imprint of Larxene's hand began to swell upon Axel's cheek. "I wasn't going to lie! Don't get your antennas in a bunch I got a plan on how to fix this..."

There was a shift in the breeze as kunai lodged into leather. Being heartless he wasn't fazed; it pierced right into the void in his chest. "Come on now, that's not nice" Axel mused, struggling to pull it out.

"Just what is this plan of yours then?"

A playful smirk spread across Axel's face; momentarily he resembled a mischievous clown. "We're going to have to make Marluxia manlier. And I know just who the call for help…"

**This was fun. Though now I'm starting to feel guilty for taking the day off from school. Oh well, please rate and review 3**


End file.
